Note: Sarah Logan Kenney was the daughter of Elsie, Anna Clayton Logan’s second-born daughter.
My father was not well so we decided to move to Pensacola. Being a lawyer, he planned to work with Tom (Kennedy) in the land business. My grandmother died in 1924 and left Mama a little money. She used it to buy a Model T Ford in 1925. I was taught to drive so that I could drive the family to Pensacola. I was 13 years old at the time. We made the trip safely and moved into a cottage Aunt Sadie owned next to her place on Scenic Highway…My father died suddenly in the Spring of 26–our life changed!
I started high school in 26 and Basil entered into my life. I met him at a party and believe me it was love at first sight for me. We ended up being married in 1934 and have had a good life, full of ups and downs but my love for him has never wavered.
Mama and I moved out to Oklahoma after I graduated where I went to college for one year. We lived about 20 miles from Anne (my sister) and Edmund (Hickey).
We returned to Pensacola in 31 and I went to FSCW to finish my LI degree which was sufficient to teach. I taught for two years.
In the meantime Basil and I kept up with each other. He finally finished high school at McCallie in Chattanooga, Tennessee. Once while I was in OK, I received a letter from him–addressed to me–but starting off Dear Nancy! I put it back in the envelope and returned it to Basil. I never did find out if she got my letter.
While I was in Tallahassee Basil was at the University of Fla. He had what he called a car. To me it was a motor with four wheels. Anyway he showed up in Tally most every weekend. One time I had to buy his tires and give him money to get home to Caryville. He did not last long at the Univ. He was never a student but is smart about a lot of things. Anyway, they politely asked him to leave.
And there is where Sarah’s memoir ends.
Sarah Logan and Basil Kenney married and had two daughters, Jacqueline Logan Kenney (Jackie) and Ann Clayton Logan.
Jackie was my mother-in-law.
Jackie married William Shelton Quarles II (Billy) and had four children: William Shelton III (Biff), Susan, Anne and Robert (Bob). Bob was my husband and our story has been detailed in my memoir, Aprils and Decembers.
Memoirs are tricky things. In the moments, even if those moments extend into years and decades, they are still much more awkward and clumsy when the living are still aware enough to reflect and relive. It is only after people have passed on that subsequent generations can freely ingest the triumphs and tragedies of the ones who came before without feeling the burdens of judgment or the pain of loss or suffering. It’s much easier to celebrate a family’s rich history, like the one that Anna Clayton Logan enjoyed growing up, after a good deal of time has passed.
In Anna’s case, it’s honestly like reading an American history textbook, but the realities of growing up both before and after the devastation and change that came with the Civil War still felt all too personal to me, for the first time ever. That’s what Jackie loved about this diary. Those were her people, and she loved knowing about and being connected to their amazing lives inside of the most historic of American histories.
I was far beyond the years when I knew Jackie Quarles before I realized the aristocratic history of her family. It is an honor for me to be able to preserve it here for her grandchildren (including my son Ben, her 8th and last grandchild), her great grandchildren (at this writing, she has eight!), her great great grandchildren, and so on…for all the descendants of the very remarkable Anna Clayton Logan.
It is a gift to know these stories, even if they merely scrape the surface of the experiences of these intriguing and fascinating people, living lives that were both extraordinary and mundane at the same time.
I hope it plants a seed in you as well, one that grows and blooms into a desire to record your own family’s history. Tell a story that will live on forever.
Your children and their children and their children will thank you.
John and Gertie came in from Idaho. They spent a part of their time with us and a part with the Tuckers in Lexington. This was the last time we saw John. He went back to Idaho and died January 15th. He requested that he be buried in our lot in Salem. He died bravely as a Christian. How I thank God for that blessing. Gertrude’s mother went to Idaho and returned with Gertie and was at our house at the funeral. They had a fearful trip, delayed by a snow storm. Gertie went to Lexington to live with her parents. She was and is devoted to John. Her parents are dead now and she had a home in Winchester, Virginia.
For a long time Gertie joined us in our reunions, but she had the care of her mother and then my husband’s death obliged me to close my house. One year while Elsie was at school Bob and Sadie went to Baltimore. They went by boat and enjoyed it. Sadie was especially pleased. She had been out very little. She was a lovely child in person and disposition. Another trip was to Hampton. Bob took all the children. Our friends the Langhornes went. They had a fine trip. This was the Assembly of Ships at Hampton Rhodes, and one visit Phil and I took to W. Virginia together in September 1902. He was the joy of my heart, the darling of the whole family. We stayed a month. John Lee was born. Sallie, Nancy, and Maud are cute little girls and Phil loved to play with them.
John Lee is not* a married man and a soldier in France. He is a lieutenant in the artillery. Just think what changes I have seen, how many of my family gone, and I left with so many memories.
I have never been robust, but with all my inferminies* I must have had great powers of enjurance* and a strong constitution.
John and Phil went to To anole* College, Elsie to Baltimore, Sadie to Mrs. Gay. Mollie spent the winter in Wilmington, North Carolina with Janice Strange and also visited Mary McCrea.
The next year 1893 was an accumulation of horrors. In January my mother fell down the steps and injured herself dreadfully, and was in bed many weeks and never recovered from the fall. So when a telegram came saying Strother was ill with pneumonia I had to get Bob to go to him as it was impossible for me to leave my mother. Strother only lived five days. A very remarkable incident occurred. We had a telegram Saturday night from the doctor saying the crisis had passed and Strother had a chance to recover. Sunday morning we were so relieved. While at breakfast we heard a heavy fall. Sadie and Mary White rushed up to my mother’s room and found her. When they entered the room she said, “Strother is dead”. My mother became unconscious. The doctor came at once and applied restoratives. Then a telegram came saying Strother had died at 9:30 a.m., just the identical moment my mother fell. A remarkable coincidence. She thought he was better, from the news the night before.
This was a great blow, especially to my mother and to me for Strother is like a son to me. I am 21 years older and have had the care of him always from the day my mother went to Lexington. I weaned him and educated him. He lived with me until he went to New York and had visited me every summer. He was as my son. I do not attempt to write of our sorrow.
In June, Joe and family and Mercer and Lizzie and Gertie met at our house. We had a joyous time. Philip was the life of the house. He had recovered from his burns and was such a handsome boy. He was a find* mimic and kept us laughing all the time. He and John usually drove to Salem every afternoon, but John had promised Lewis Langhorne so Phil went with Erskine Burdell to Mason’s Creek to join the other boys swimming. Georgine and I went to pay calls and stopped at the photographer’s gallery to arrange for a sitting on Tuesday. This was Saturday, June 10th. While we were there we were sent for and when we got their Annie Langhorne came to meet us and said for us to drive to Mason’s creek. Mr. Langhorne and professor Cannady drove with me and we got to the bridge I saw my husband stricken with grief. I did not need to be told that our darling was drowned. We drove together with our darling in our laps. Every effort was made to restore him. God alone knows the agony we suffered.
Since then I think my husband’s and John’s death and my mother’s are the result. But God has seen fit to let me live and suffer. I never finished my book. I could not see for a number of years and now I am too old. My brother died in February the 5th 1893. Phil was drowned June 10th 1893 and my mother died August 21st 1893. My husband died December 26th, 1900, my father February 9th, 1903. Lettie G. Logan January 17th, 1918, and Philip C. Logan September 1919.
There is a great deal I can write but I am old and get tired. Things went on as usual. My sister Jeannie had five children., I had four, and George three. On October 27th my son Philip Clayton was born. A friend said he was the prettiest baby he had ever seen. Sadie, I thing*, was just as pretty but all my children were. And although they had all the diseases known to children went safely through all, with no trained nurse and no hospital. Beside the ordinary diseases my father and mother had frequent attacks of jaundice and rheumatism. I nursed them too.
When Philip was a year old I had a desperate illness and was an invalid for five years, lying on a chair which my brother John sent me from New York. My mother and Mollie and Elsie were in Wythville visiting but came home at once. I gave up the choir. My mother took charge of everything and my family came as usual. When Phil was three years old, John was married in October in Lexington to Gertrude, the draught of John Randolph Tucker. Mercer was married a few days before in Wythville to Elizabeth Kent Caldwell. They went to John’s wedding and both met at my home. I was still on the bed or chair. My house had only four bedrooms, but by crowding my little flock I managed to take them in. We had a week of festivity. Edith went to John’s marriage and was with us a few days. Then they all left. I could not have done a thing without my mother.
The next event was horrible. My dear beautiful Philip, in the absence of his nurse who had to fill the cooks place was burned almost to death. He swallowed the flames and our good doctor Wiley had gone to the country. I never saw such bravery as the little fellow showed as I sat with him in my arms for three hours until I was numb from head to foot. I gave him a dose of laudanum and for a while he alpet*. When he awakened he began to sing Jesus Meek and Gentle, and although he could hardly articulate his eyes and throat were so swollen, he would try to sing and would say, “why don’t the Doc come on?” and then sing again. Oh God, how he suffered and how I agonized watching him, but never a murmur escaped his poor swollen lips. I nursed him without help, up night and day, kneeling by his cradle for six weeks, without changing my clothes except for the wash. I sang until I was hoarse.
Friends were king, especially my cousin Robert Logan, Mrs. Blair, Mr Langhorn, Dr. Wiley and Dr. Armstrong, God bless them all. And then in January he had scarlett fever and they were agin* kind. Dear little boy, how patient and lovely you were. It seems impossible that I have lived without him. His face was sadly disfigured but its beauty was restored.
Things went on. Mollie and Elsie went to school to Aunt Mollie Barnet. All the children went to her. She was a dear old lady. When the children all had the measles John was the sickest. Elsie fell and broke her arm and agin* I had a time. She had a compound fracture of the elbow and was very nervous, suffered so terribly with indigestion and the inconveniente* of the way her arm was bandaged.
Phil had to be brought out of doors to me for his food and took cold and was ill with pneumonia and poor John had chilblains on his heel. He suffered greatly. My whole time was taken up with Elsie who would not allow anyone to come in the room. This was 1881, and should have come in before. Phil was burned in 1883 and had scarlet fever in 1884. The family came as usual.
The summer of 1884 George brought his family, Joe, George, and Louise. They rented rooms across the street and took meals with us. Louise was a very attractive child and pretty. George rented Miss Betty Coles’ house. She was a first cousin of my Aunt Martha and a distant cousin of my father. She was much attached to us. She died the summer before.
I wish I could tell all the smart little speeches of my children, but I suffer so with my back after I write. Philip and Mollie said the brightest things. Mollie came from school quite indignant and threw her books on the bed.
“I shall never go to that teacher again!”
I inquired into her grievance. The teacher had heard someone else in her time.
She said, “I just let her know I am as much of a person as anybody.” And she would not go again.
Phil was a mimic and kept us in roars of laughter. He would say his prayers most devoutly and tell God exactly what he must do. He would say, now God, they all say I must be good. It is all your fault. If you will just kill the Devil all the boys will be good.
Whatever he wanted he would kneel down and ask for it. All this he did when three or four years old.
Elsie did some cunning things. One day I noticed little slits in the new carpet. She said, “Oh, I cut those button holes. Aren’t they nice ones?” She was very proud of them. Another day she cut every bud from the Devonshire roses, much to my mother’s horror. Sadie was pretty and a little mother to John and Phil.
One day after the earthquake John and Phil sat on the side porch discussing it. Phil said, “John, what do you think God sent that earthquake for?” John was always a solemn child. He deliberated a while and then said, “I reckon Phil, God saw that people had gotten used to thunderstorms and wind and he thought would try something else to let them know he was still up there..”
Dear John and Phil. That may account for the late terrible war. Laura Lee Grant was with us. It was distinctly felt. Pictures were knocked down from the wall and dishes knocked off the table. It was a horrible disaster. My Uncle Joseph Logan of Atlanta came often to Salem to see us with his first wife, Aunt Ann Eliza and daughter Jeanie Laura. Uncle Joe afterwards married Alice Clark, now living in California. Uncle Joe was a handsome, clever man. We always enjoyed their visits.
Edith, my sister was married at our house. I gave her a beautiful breakfast. Mollie and Ellen Blair, Elsie and Julie Burdell were her attendants. It was a pretty wedding. If I had more time I would write a description. Edith married Mr. Thomas L. Hurt of Molloway county. She had three children Eldridge, Sadie, and Carrie. Dear Edith, so whole souled and generous, and very pretty. John, Joe, George, Strother and also my generous husband all helped and gave her presents. Every summer the family met at our house. John and wife lived in New York, After Strother graduated he went to New York to live, was at first in a bank and afterwards in newspaper work. He was very successful. My brother Joe was married to Georgine Washington Willis of Orange county Virginia. Mercer, John and Strother went to the wedding. Mollie also went. They went to New York on a bridal trip. Mollie had a lovely visit. She was old enough to remember it. That fall she went to Wythville to school to Mrs. Dew. She had a very nice time and was over at Mercer’s and Lizzie’s a great deal. She remembers those days with much pleasure.
The next event of interest was 1888, the “Golden Wedding”. A description of this was written by our good friend Dr. Oscar Wiley which I copy here. We all enjoyed this. Georgine and Lizzie came a few days ahead and we worked hard. I had so many in the house, and my room and the children’ nursery had to be converted into rooms for entertainment which necessitated very constant work.
We had a large and happy gathering, a great many presents. There was one dark cloud, the absence of John and Gertrude. John’s health was seriously affected. He was ordered to Idaho and had been appointed Judge in Idaho, and of course could not come. The children at the Golden Wedding looked so pretty. Phil was 8, John 10, Sadie 12, Elsie 14, Mollie 16. Mollie went to Richmond to Mr. Powell’s school. She and Ellen boarded with Aunt Kenningham Claiborne while there. Mollie had Roseola and used her eyes imprudently. Soon she could not go on. Her eyes have given her trouble ever since.
The same year I got a teacher for the others. All were going to school. She was a very smart, well educated woman and a fine teacher, but very disagreeable and unpleasant member of the family. I was in wretched health. Had I been well, I think things would have been different. She was very hateful to my dear mother and the children but pleasant to me. She stayed the first year well enough, but we did not keep her all the last session.
My mother went to visit Joe at Union and carried Elsie and Sadie. They had a nice visit. There they met the Peels, Englishmen who afterwards came to Salem and lived, buying property, etc. I can’t tell what they did. It would fill a book.
The girls had very nice trips. Sadie, Mollie, and Elsie went to the Chicago Exposition with the Langhornes and Gilmer Patton and enjoyed it. Elsie and Mollie went to Albion New York to visit Pearly Curtis. They spent some time finding it very delightful. They spent some time in a cottage on Lake Ontario. Before this trip Elsie went to Baltimore to school to Mrs. Tutwiler, Mt. Vernon Institute. Here Elsie won all honors. Her health improved very much and she made firm friends. Mrs. Tutwiler invited Mollie to visit Elsie and the next summer Mrs. Tutwiler visited Elsie. A very charming woman. I think she had a lively time, and our friends were so attentive. Sadie went to school to Mrs. Gay, who established a fine school in Salem. John and Phil went to college preparatory school with Professor C.B. Cannady in charge. It was very satisfactory. They afterward went to Roanoke College.
I am that American you heard about, the one who moved to Cairo six months ago to live permanently as I start this new, exciting chapter of the post-marriage-and-children book of my life. You’ve probably seen the highlight reel and reveled in the exotic moments right along with me these past few months, and my excitement about all the newness was always genuine and childlike. Now, however, I can report that the honeymoon is over and I can finally tell you the rest of the story.
It’s incredibly hard to live abroad.
It’s particularly difficult to move from a place of abundance and equality to a place of mild first-world depravity and deeply-ingrained gender roles inclusive of a lifestyle shift so enormous that it rattles and upends at times. Culture shock is a very, very real thing and I am smack in the middle of its trenches right now.
There’s so much to tell someone who is interested in learning about this kind of experience, so I think I’ll begin where my day begins. I wake to the sound of the Muslim Call to Prayer in the dark hours of every early morning. An imam’s deep, ominous voice bellows through the open windows of my apartment in a sad song of worship that I have learned to completely tune out. In my first few months I kind of enjoyed it, the exoticness of how devout and faithful it sounds, but now I can just turn it off like a mom can turn off her whining children. The same goes for the honking horns that never go quiet for more than a second at a time. City sounds. Dogs barking, motorcycles speeding, people screaming angry Arabic profanities at each other in the street. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fall asleep to the sound of silence, or crickets, or waves crashing, ever again. It would be too quiet. I would think something terrible was about to happen if everything were too still. Cat rape is now my lullaby.
I remember moving my own suitcases into my first apartment. I was met by a servant, a bawab, who rushed over to shoo me away so he could lift and carry my things inside for me. The rushing and shooing has not stopped since. It still feels strange at the grocery store when the check-out clerks meet me in the aisle to carry and empty my basket for me periodically throughout my shopping, and then they ask again and again – in charades – to let them carry my groceries all the way to my apartment for me, and finally I’ve had to learn to just let them. It keeps the world in order. I have to force myself to let them. It is hard to come from a country where official female empowerment was first born, where equality for women has rendered us needless of any assistance, where women are cheered for being able to do everything for themselves and usually men don’t even try to intervene anymore, to now live in a place where men are constantly scrambling to help me do everything. It’s awkward, because these are not the rules I was raised following. With that, however, comes another facet of Middle Eastern masculinity…a dark and controlling version, and while I enjoy the chivalry of having four different men scramble to move my plants for me, there has also been more than one instance where a man offered me unwanted advice or admonishments carefully disguised as protectiveness. It makes them feel awkward to be near a woman who is self-expressive in dress and language, or one who is aggressively independent. The men here don’t like it when I refuse their help, and they are chafed when I tell them to mind their own business when they are being judgmental of my choices.
They don’t know what to do with themselves if a woman is doing for herself, and if they’re ever left standing idly by while I take out my own garbage, it confuses their understanding of the world.
This is especially true regarding someone whose job it is to be a servant. There is a caste system here with deeply entrenched social layers separating the haves from the have-nots, and I have been coached into accepting the normalcy of being catered to like a visiting celebrity or a foreign diplomat. It makes them feel irritated when I don’t play my role properly and yet I hate doing it; it damages our understanding of one another when I don’t. It damages our friendships, too, sadly.
One of my beloved drivers (yes, I have a driver, almost every foreigner does) spent every day of a month trying to convince me that I needed to marry him, not because he was in love with me, but because he said it was not appropriate that I didn’t have a husband. It’s noteworthy to mention that he was already married but in Egyptian culture, Muslim men are permitted to marry four wives and one of them is allowed to be a Christian. So I was the lucky lady. He asked me on our drive home many times if I would I ever convert to Islam. Absolutely not. Then, would I ever wear my hair covered in a scarf. No, never. But in his opinion, which he shared with me every day, my difficult adjustment to this strange, new life (which I often shared with him) would be made so much easier if I did a better job at conforming. He was a good friend and, among other things, he taught me a great deal of the Arabic that I now know how to speak. But once he started pointing out that my skirts sometimes inappropriately showed my knees, it was time for us to part ways. Now, remembering his advice, I simply wear a fake wedding ring and this seems to keep the unwanted attention at bay.
Not all of the men in Egypt are devout admirers of the quiet, covered woman.
In fact, Egypt is full of men who reject the young, pre-arranged marriages that are expected of them, and they put off having their children until after their thirties. This is unusual behavior, for sure, and it is harder than any Westerner can imagine to date regularly, and successfully, in this old-fashioned mega-conservative culture. Couples marry very young here because it’s the only real way they can get to know each other properly. It is against the law for an unmarried Egyptian person to get a hotel room with someone from the opposite sex and many landlords will not permit their tenants to have company of the opposite sex in an apartment, certainly not overnight. On the one hand, my inbox gets no rest from the incessant pings of eager young 20-something-year-olds who proclaim to think I am beautiful and want to have coffee. They proudly chase older women, and their goals certainly seem to involve bagging that elusive blonde. They are confident and aggressive and way more hypersexual than I thought any Middle Easterner could be. The problem is, men in the Middle East live at home until they are married, which means that a single man of any age probably still lives with his parents. Worse, to meet a man my age, you can certainly assume that the most you can ever hope for is to be Mistress, or Wife Number 2 or Wife Number 3, because by 40, an unmarried man is suspiciously abnormal. But guess what? I found one once. Believe it or not, I met someone who was much closer to my age than to my son’s, and he had never been married or had children (so he said…). As we grew closer, I wondered why the progression of our relationship never picked up steam like it should. The answer was again partly found in cultural expectations, and for the first time in my life, I realized that I was the kind of woman that most Egyptian families would never accept. I wouldn’t have, in all of my life, imagined that I would one day be hidden from a man’s family and friends out of shame. I was too old, too already-been-married, too divorced, too already-has-children, too Christian and too foreign to ever be considered proper partner material for an Egyptian prince, no matter how old he was and no matter how amazing I was. In this culture, the men want to sleep with Americans (and we can’t blame them, can we ladies?), but they will marry Egyptian virgins. Period. It feels normal for an American woman to be appalled by this at first, but then I must admit, I can understand how they feel, having a son myself. We want what we want for our baby boys.
There is good news. I’ve lost my American weight living in the Middle East.
The locals would tell you they have the most delicious food in the world, but I am not a fan. Egyptian food is heavy on the carbs. I’ve been hungry for most of the time I’ve lived here, in one way because this is not a culture of cars and drive-throughs and in another way because I simply can’t find the things I need to cook the foods I love myself. I bought all the ingredients for a winter pot of chili once, and then discovered that chili powder as I know it does not exist here. The kind of chili powder they sell in Egypt would kill a white person. Most days I live on salads and cheese sandwiches while I fantasize about my mother’s pot roast and potatoes. Dinner for one at a restaurant is often my only option, so I almost always pass on the sadness of eating out alone. Instead, I have made a habit of skipping meals altogether and taking long walks instead. The streets of a big city cry out to be explored, so most afternoons I strap on my earbuds and walk a few miles around the island of Zamalek where I live, all by myself, thinking hard about whether or not I love (or hate) living in absolutely anonymity. I never see anyone I know and nobody knows me either, which is what I keep reminding myself about as the locals gawk and stare at the inappropriateness of my Nike leggings. It can be very lonely and also very liberating, at the same time. I still don’t know some days how I feel about it all, but walking three miles a day instead of eating three meals a day has made me stronger and leaner. After ten years of trying to lose twenty pounds, it has turned out to be very simple and effortless to do here, where the whole world does not revolve around food, and so I try to focus on the positive. Plus, the Ramadan fast is coming, and I am pretty pumped about that.
What is not surprising is what I miss the most, and that’s my people back home.
I have a community of foreigners here with me, people who are all in the same boat as I am, who cope with these experiences too. We lean on each other to survive. There is always someone who is also having a lonely day, and when they call and say “I’m coming over!” I am always happy they thought of me first. I have an impressive international circle of girlfriends that I am also very proud of, Europeans and Middle Easterners alike, so I am not at a loss for regular company or friends. Quite the opposite. But these friends are not the ones who love me, who miss me, who think about me and how I’m really doing over here. They are not the people who live down the street, the ones who will come over and walk right in my front door, they are not the friends who have known me my whole life. They are not part of my history.
They are not like talking to my child on the phone, for example. There is nothing in this hemisphere that compares to hearing my son’s voice on the other end of the line, even one that has a terrible connection.
On a day when I am enduring the frustrating third-world internet I have grown accustomed to, I feel the pangs of homesickness when they are at their most brutal. Social media is my lifeline, and I cannot imagine the generations of people who have in the past done what I am doing now who didn’t have those instant tethers of connectivity to home. I would go insane if I could not log on and see what you guys are doing back home everyday.
I think I read somewhere, a million somewheres probably, that happiness doesn’t come find you and sit neatly in your lap for you to enjoy. You have to create it for yourself. You have to go out into the world and intentionally make the moves that line up a life that makes you happy. And I do try. It’s work, just like a job, and it’s hard, so much harder than I thought. Still, I wake up everyday and say prayers of thanks for the blessings I have been given and what this move to Egypt has enabled me to do for myself… financially, romantically, professionally, spiritually, and psychologically. It’s not a question of whether I need to be here or not. I know I do; this is my home and I do love it. There is something about every day here that makes me smile and feel gratefulness. There are beautiful things all around me that the people I know and love most in the world will never get to see, and I get to see them all the time. For this, I am deeply thankful. Sometimes, though, like this morning, when I made my pot of coffee with my very expensive imported Mr. Coffee machine, but then settled for a just-okay cup of coffee because I cannot get my favorite International Delight Sweet Cream here, I really just wanted to cry and get in my Jeep and go get a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts. Instead, I went for another long walk along the River Nile, and I must tell you, it was amazing.
When Mollie began to talk she gave everyboyd* names. She was confused as my father called my mother “Sarah” and the rest of us called her Mama. She puzzled her brain and evolved the name Mama Sarah. Then for her father, she gave the name Daddy Bob, for me Annie Ma, coupling the two names. Then one day she said to my father, “Papa what is your name. He said James, and then with a very satisfied air she said “Papa James.”
That summer my brother John came. She called him Johnny and was very fond of him. He could only stay a month. Later in the season my brother Jimmy came. He puzzled her greatly. She gazed at him and finally she gave a little laugh and said, “This is black Johnny”. And he was always black Johnny. His complexion was very dark.
Mercer stayed at Mr. Airy a good deal with Liv. Hansbrough. Edith, Nellie and Dick with Jeannie. We now had to move again, our rented house sold and we moved to the Miller house. Aunt Martha came often to see us. Here November 27, 1864 Elsie was born. She had a fine, face, and grew to be very pretty. She did much that was interesting. My brother Jimmy On March 1875 came from University of Virginia with pneumonia. He had taught school and was pursuing studies in an academic course there. He came to us every summer so he saved his money. His ultimate desire was to enter the ministry. He was a most gifted man, handsome physically, brilliant in mind, a lovely disposition, and a well-rounded character at 21. He needed no training, So God loved the young man and took him unto himself. He remained with us until he died. My mother and I nursed him. As poor as we were, he suffered for nothing, and how I cherish the hours I spent with him.
He loved my* as much as I did him and trusted me as I did him. I thank God I had the care of him and could do what I did. Dr. Bittle of Roanoke College came often to see him and preached his funeral and wrote his obituary.
I went this summer to see Bob’s mother in Newport, Giles county, carrying the two dear little girls. We enjoyed the trip in a carriage over the mountains and had every kindness from Addison and this wife.
I still taught school in the mornings with Mrs. Michel (General Johnston’s sister) a very clever and agreeable old lady. I had to keep up school, as Edith, Nellie, and Strother were still at school and I still gave music lessons. This kept me busy. I had no time for social duties, but kept up my church duties, singing in the choir and playing the organ. My mother being with me, I could do it. She often said this to me, “Anna, we could not live without each other.”
The march after Jim’s death, mu* husband bought me a home on Broad street. We had moved so often we bought this place. We lived happily there. Mercer went to the seminary at Alexandria, Edith got a position to teach in Maryland. Joe decided to study law. I asked my cousin James Patton of Union, West Virginia to take him as a favor to me, so he was nicely fixed we hoped.
And so Strother was the only permanent one left, though they call came every year. Edith and Mercer were with us for the summerand* the others for a month. Nellie was of course with us. She was a most satisfactory child, had a talent for music and a pretty voice. She was with us until her health gave way. Dear Nellie, we had the best doctor and I took her to New port. She enjoyed her visit and the ride over. Everyone loved her. She was one of the prettiest little girls I ever saw, but was not when grown, but so satisfactory with such a fine character.
Edith was so very pretty. In the fall of this year she grew weaker and we knew she would leave us, though for a beautiful home He’d gone to prepare. We were terribly grieved. My health was very bad. I could not go up stairs, nor she come to me, so she would send me word to sing and I would open my door and sing as long as she wanted me to.
On February 27th, 1876 another dear little girl was born. I was unable to walk for two months. I had my good nurse Emma. Aunt Martha stayed all the time should could. My dear mother had all she could do to take care of Nellie who needed a great deal of care. Dear child she suffered so. In the spring she left us and how we missed her. And when the boys and eith* came we had a sad reunion. They enjoyed the homecoming and the three little girls, all so pretty and good. And they were such a comfort to my bereved* partants* who now lived with us. A more generous man than my husband I have never know*. His house was the house of my brothers and sisters when they needed one every summer. God has, I earnestly pray blessed him forever for it. He had only his profession, no other help. His mother died of pneumonia February 27th, the day Sadie was born. She had a small property, most of it she left her other son. She left some mountain land to Bob which I afterwards sold for $500 and have invested in Salem town bonds.
(*Edith, *bereaved, *parents, *known)
My brother John had now formed partnerships with Mr. Willis and brought him to spend the month. I did not like, I never trusted him. They enjoyed their visit. George came from Atlanta, Mercer from the suminary*, Joe from S. Virginia. He was in the office of Caperton and Patton. Edith was there too for the summer. All these were there the summer after Nellie died. Mother and I had our hands full. Mollie and Elsie were now most interesting and Sadie was the prettiest of all. The public school was now absorbing all others, and as I had paid my debts for the paint and some on the silver, and there were three children my husband advised me to give up the school and give only music lessons, which I did for several years.
My husband had a good practice. My brother George married in 1877 to Miss Lettie Grant of Atlanta, Ga. and came to see us. They stayed several weeks. We liked her very much and became much attached to her. On July 17, 1878 My son John delighted our hearts by being a boy. He was exceedingly ugly. I remember my dear aunt said when she saw him, “Well, boy, you are very ugly but you have lots of sense or I am mistaken.” Which proved true, sand he grew to be a wonderfully handsome man.
My dear aunt died and how we missed her, one of the best women God ever made. She died November, 1878. Dear old doctor Griffin died in the fall of 1879. We lived along as usual, with family reunion the summer. I went over to Union, W. Virginia in the buggy with Joe on his return to visit Jim Patton and his wife. Nellie was there. I enjoyed stopping at Sweet Springs for dinner and at White Sulphur for the night. My health was not good so all agreed I had better go off for a while. I had two nurses, as Sadie could not walk. I had a very pleasant visit and went with Willie Patton and wife to Lexington where he had a professorship at V.M.I. I Met at Jim’s Rita Hughs’ daughter and two of Eliza Gilmer’s sons and George Gilmer who married Rita and whose I saw many years afterward in Lynchburg. I am glad they knew who I was. I was devoted to all the Pattons from my childhood. Cousin Patton was related through the Williams and Claytons.
She was an elegant woman. In* enjoyed my visit with Willie and wife and I was interested in V.M.I. My Uncle John’s name was the first enrolled there and at Washington college my grandfather, Rev. Joseph D. Logan was one of the first, if not the first teachers. It was then called Amherst college. My uncle Joseph Logan was a graduate of Washington college and so was my Uncle Philip Clayton Strother. Then my friends General Lee and General Custis Lee were presidents. General Lee died there and has the Valentinis statue in memorial. After the Lees, Hon. John Randolph Tucker was president, and he was followed by his son, Harry St. George Tucker.
I came home after a nice visit, glad to see my babies and to relieve my dear mother. I found all well.
I enjoyed my cousin’s many West Point stories. He loved to tell of his experiences there to the day of his death. He was placed in charge of camps at Lynchburg to train soldiers and afterwards was at Fort Donalson with General Floyd, and was there when it was captured. He escaped as the prisoners were brough* over the Mississippi River, was a fine swimmer, and though shot at several times escaped and stayed in the bushes for three days without food. He finally found friends, returned to the army and was in command of a regiment. He fought in many battles. In the Battle of Winchester he was promoted for gallantry. He had two horses killed from under him but he was not wounded. He wrote me a full history of his was* record but that, and all my valuable papers, letters, pictures, books, manuscripts were destroyed in the Atlanta fire.
I returned to my work. I had a dear little girl, Nellie Dimmock to board with me. She and my sister Nellie were two dear children together. Nellie had a lovely voice and was quite clever. She was always satisfactory and so dependable.
Our family now began to scatter. John, struggling in a law office in New York City, George in Atlanta, Ga. as clerk in Chamberlain and Johnsons, Jimmie teaching in the family of Mrs. Cook in Greenville, Va. Oh, Jimmie, my beautiful brother, so everything that is lovely, clever, and good. I love th* think of you dear, so attractive and beautiful.
Emmie is still a devoted friend, married and lives in Baltimore. She and her husband visited me and I went twice to see her. She had had what seemed her misfortunes like all have. Emmie’s stepmother and I have been faithful friends from our schooldays. We have corresponded since 1859. That year I visited her at her home, Sherwood, in Gloucester, Va. I had a most delightful visit, enjoying every member of her family and the hospitality of her charming neighbors. From her home Mrs. Selden carried us to visit relatives in Norfolk and to Old Point. This was my very first visit to a watering place*. There I met friends and it was joyous. But in our life the bitter and sweet come together. When I went home in about three weeks the typhoid fever developed and I suffered greatly–ill unto death. There were no trained nurses and my family and friends were worn out. All expected me to die, the communion administered. I was in a state of coma, but conscious, but could not speak. If I could feel it necessary I could tell a great deal more of this illness, but I haven’t time or strength. I was six months recuperating and my friends welcomed me as a return from a far country.
(*a place that serves alcohol)
I must not dwell on days gone by, but come back to my story, our struggles and trials in Salem. Each summer the boys came home, the school went on. I had to borrow money to buy a piano. I borrowed from my friend Colonel George P. Taylor. Rev. Mr. Ingle purchased a Steinway in Washington D.C. This hampered me but I could not go on giving lessons on the old one, and my sister Nellie and Edith had to be instructed. Music was thought a necessary party* of Education. My cousin proposed marriage but I could not desert my family not marry in debt. And we had the misfortune to have my little brother fall from a tree and injured his back. He was in bed for weeks. Of course this added to our expense. The spoons, feather beds, cut glass and china were all sold, so demands on me were to* great to think of matrimony. But I gave him my promise. He was doing fairly well in his profession and gaining favor among older lawyers, Judge Staples, Mr. Johnson and others. That year, 1871, and the next were very hard on my*. I was broken down in health, in debt and had no help. Jeannie was married and I had to pay board for a teacher and a salary, Mercer’s attack of pneumonia, Strother’s fall — both Doctor’s bills to meet.
(part*, too*, me*)
But my determination to help my mother and father never flagged*, though I was often tired and wondered how it would end. There were so many of us, it was a trying ordeal. My cousin persisted and I resisted. The public school had reduced my school. Some of my best paying scholars went to boarding school. My cousin begged that I would let him help. He prescribed his case that I would add to his comfort, that he could pay his board and mine and that this would greatly aid my poor tired mother, and as the family were all in favor I was no longer obdurate and agreed. So we were married on a very cold December morning in 1871, and went to Lotheringgay, the ancestral home of his mother’s people, the Edmundsons. Here we spent a week and then turned to work.
I will mention in passing that I spent $100 on my trousseau, had a few presents from my nothern* friends and my dear mother gave me one dozen cut glass tumblers and a counterpane, and old fashioned Marseilles, inherited from the grand daughter of Governor Spottswoods. Some of my family have thought and said that I had all that was left. I wish to say that I haven’t one article from Dungeness that I did not pay for in cash. The pieces of silver, my husband bought for $300, the price my mother offered it to strangers for. I could not see it go, so we borrowed money and saved it so it is my very own. I do not wish to be misunderstood by those I love so well. I had receipts but like other valuables they were burned in the Atlanta fire.
1872 was a much happier and more restful year. We felt the comfort of a strong arm to lean on, and I saw Bob happy and improved, more serious and thoughtful. Others remarked on it. I remember at a church festival given by Lutheran Church Dr. Biddle, president of Roanoke came to me and said, “Ah, madam. I consider you a greater reformer than Martin Luther.”
“How?” I asked wonderingly.
“Why you have made a tame man out of a wild one.”
“Ah, Dr. the material was there or I could not have brought it out.”
“Yes, yes, that is true. Robert is a fine fellow.”
In the spring Jeannie had a second son, James Logan. He grew to be a favorite of mine and is still. This year I only taught half a day in the morning. We had two sessions, Miss Julia Bittle taking afternoons. In the summer we had our reunion. We still lived over the drugstore, but we crowded in and enjoyed it, at least I did.
On September 9th, 1872 a dear little girl came to us. My mother named her for my dear sister Mary Louisa, which pleased me, though I wanted her named Sarah for my mother. She was a joy to the household.
I taught school in the afternoon and gave music lessons. We had a visit from Cousin Elsie, Bob’s mother, a dear old lady whom we all enjoyed. She sent the Baby Mollie a cow after she left, which was a pleasure to the family. We had been limited in our supply of milk since we left Dungeness. We got on pretty well. Bob was a great help, and was always so bright and cheerful. My father and mother and family were devoted to him.
I played the organ in church and Sunday school. In the summer I paid Jeannie a visit. She had two boys, so the babies kept us busy. In the fall my duties began, the boys went to the vocations, John to N.Y. city, George to Atlanta. Jim and Joe were teaching. Joe got a position as tutor in the family of Mrs. George Willis, Jim taught in the family of Mrs. Cook. Both gave satisfaction.
Mollie walked then at 13 months and talked very clearly. She was a very attractive little thing with lovely eyes and hair. A very winsome child, everyone spoiled her, the family and schoolchildren. When 13 months old she had a nurse, a girl about 16 years old who lived with us eight years and nursed all my children, a faithful, efficient girl.
Oh, that was a trying year. I arranged with Roanoke College that John and Joe go there and Dr. Bittle and Dr. Davis sent me their daughters in exchange. We worked very hard. My dear mother at home, Jeanie and I at school. We taught all day until 4 p.m. and gave music lessons in the afternoon. This year I took boys and my father assisted with them. My mother had three young men for meals, Henry Fairfax, Fairfax Irving and a Mr. Snowden. She had a cook. Servants were reasonable then in price, so she had time to sew and see to things, but our life was very hard.
We did not know from day to day how we could live. My father had $30,000 due him and never could collect one cent but was forced to pay the $10,000 he owed on that untimely purchase. So our home had to be sold at less than half its value. It was heart breaking to them and to me who voluntarily undertook the responsibility. Jeannie was supposed to assume it also, but in 1869 in December the 31st she married Mr. Samuel White, and then I had an assistant to pay, not only her board but her salary. Of course this increased my obligations and everything was so uncertain. I had one boarder, Alice Smith, afterwards Mrs. Joshua Brown. Her board was paid by groceries and the sale of feather beds. We had more than we needed. And my mother had to sell old silver spoons that had belonged to Aunt Polly, the granddaughter of Governor Spotswood. My little brother Mercer always a brave boy, used to carry a spoon or fork every morning to Mr. Page, the jeweler and he would give him ninety cents and my mother used it to the best advantage. Flour was $14 a barrel but eggs, butter, meat, chickens, nor labor was so high.
My school proved a success. I did not visit, but helped in all church affairs. I remember an old folks concert in which I sang old fashioned songs and encored repeatedly. I had no practicing to do and nothing to woory* over as I wore a simple black silk (borrowed) and white kerchief and cap, also borrowed. We made over a hundred dollars for our little chapel which was then in progress of building. I went to the Wedding of Mary Griffin, a beautiful girl, and actually made a white overskirt and wore flowers in my hair. A cousin, Margie Logan, was married a few weeks thereafter and I wore the same dress. Jeannie was invited to be her bridesmaid. Margie made a lovely bride, but the poor child had a sad life.
I met this winter a cousin who was very kind to me, Robert H. Logan, a lawyer, trying to make his way too in the world. I thought him clever and handsome. He was so generous hearted and kind. He attracted me more than any man I had ever seen, not in any point of marriage, for such a possibility never entered my mind. I had too much else to think of. In December 1869 Jeannie was married in our little chapel. It was finished and decorated for Christmas, the first marriage and first decoration. I forget the details of the marriage. We could only give her $200 for the wedding. I had then an assistant, A Miss Lilla Boyden, daughter of Rev. Boydon of Cobham Albermarle County, Va. A Truly christian woman and satisfactory in every way, a delightful member of the family. We were devoted to her and much grieved at her death several years after of typhoid fever.
Another trouble, our house, the one we rented was sold to Dr. Oscar Wiley of Craig county who proved to be a steadfast lifelong friend, as did his wife. It was hard to find a house in Salem to rent and the expense of moving was an item to us poor things. We finally moved over the drug store in connection with a small house that was once owned by Mr. Penick. Here we were uncomfortably crowded and often hungry, our future impenetrable. My school was flourishing. There was great rivalry between schools, kept up by the pupils. A great deal was said of me by the puritans of the school, but I had friends among Presbyterians, although they did not patronize me.
John came and spent the summer. We stayed two years, and our school was quite an accomplished fact. I paid the rent, bought all the wood, paid the servants, doctor’s bills, had washing and sewing done. etc., so I felt glad and hoped to stay in Salem where so many were kind. Jeanie lived four miles in the country and came when she could. In December Jeanie’s oldest son was born. He was named Alexander after Sam White’s father. This was an event and we thought the little fellow fine.
This brings us to 1871. The public Schools were now instituted in Virginia so of course my school, like all others were decreased in numbers. Miss Boyden, I could not afford so I engaged Miss Bittle for half a day and we got along beautifully. She was a clever girl.
This summer my friend Mrs. James Andrews paid me a short visit and I returned with her for the rest of the summer. I enjoyed the time she was entertained once or twice in Salem. I remember a beautiful lunch given by Marion Hansbrough which Mrs. Andrews appreciated. She and her husband bothe* were faithful friends. When school was over I was completely broken down and as Mrs. Andrews gave me the trip. I was glad to go to gain rest and strength for the coming session. We went to Richmond. Mrs. Andrews wished to visit the battlefields around Richmond and Petersburg. When I arrived at the Exchange I heard of the death of a friend, Willie Worthington, who after the war went to New York City to live. I knew him well, he had visited intimately at our home Dungeness. He died of tuberculosis. Although I did not admire him altogether, he was too worldly, yet I liked him and regretted his death. I was feeling so badly I could not go around Mrs. Andrews and stayed in bed while she went alone.
Though feeling so badly, I enjoyed my visit for I loved her whole family, her husband especially was the soul of honor and generosity. Her boy Jimmie was very attractive and her mother was a fine type of woman. Now the whole family are dead, not one left. I know they were offended with me because I refused to marry Mr. Andrews nephew Robert Ripley.
This summer Joe and Mercer went to Tennessee to work with Mr. W.E. Brown John came from New York for a month. He was in the law office of Lord, Day and Lord. where he received a small salary. Our friend Rev. Wendell Prime got him the place. George came also and we enjoyed them. George was always a handsome fellow. John developed into an elegant young man and very clever. I could say more abount* them but have little strength or time. I get very tired. I must not forget the Valley Railroad which gave us all such hope for Salem’s future. The president, Robert Garrett of Baltimore visited us and the engineers we knew and strange to say we were all related, Dick Randolph, chief engineer, Richard Bolling, Ward, Buchanan, were to see us whenever in town. They worded* near Hollins. We enjoyed them and they did us. A great deal was done between Salem and Lexington. It was a woeful disappointment when the project was abandoned.
Mr. Garrett, the president, was very nice to us. They all were. Mr. Garrett gave me a position playfully one evening and said I should have a trip to Baltimore the first trip. That I never had but the position I got for Mercer. It was asked for for* Joe but he had decided to teach so I got it transferred for Mercer. They had come from Tennessee. George went out to fill Williams place who came home with typhoid fever. I had the best doctor in town. Aunt Martha and my mother did the nursing. Jeannie had a home now and Edith Nellie and Strother went with her. Her boy was a delight to them and Sam was always so kind they felt at home, and Jeannie is such bright company. Mercer recovered but could not go back to Tennessee. After he got strong I applied to Mr. Garrett and he gave the promised place. Jimmie got a clerkship at Yellow Sulphur Springs while he was there I went up on a visit to Cousin Elsie, my cousin Bob’s mother. I stayed three weeks. She was very kind and introduced me to very pleasant people. My cousin was there and added to my pleasure. He very kindly took me to Mountain, Va. a trip through the mountainous country. As we drove up the mountain there was a thunder storm. We had to drive on. In that unsettled region there was no place to stop. We drove up and up until we drove through the clouds unto the sun which was shining beyound*. Mountain Lake is a remarkable formation which in the memory of man had formed there and had no visible outlet. My cousin was very agreeable, bright and clever. He was educated at West Point Military Academy and would have graduated in July 1861 but deserted in April. All Virginians deserted where the call was made to arms by President Lincoln.
As I said previously we decided to leave the beloved home, my father, mother, and children to go to Ashland, the boys, Jim and Joe to go to Randolph Macon college, Edith, Mercer and Nellie to go to a private school. Strother was only five years old, George rented the farm, John went to teach with Mr. Dabney, Jeanie and I to go to Salem to teach. We were to meet at Dungeness and decide again what was best to do. So with sad yet glad hearts we started to make our fortunes. I had no money. My cousin loaned me some on my pioneer trip to Salem. My friend Rev. G.W. Prime rented the house in Ashland. If we failed in Salem we were to go to Ashland. I had no southern friend that (had) a penny more than I did, so being obliged to fulfil my engagement I went to Richmond to see my father’s commissioner and found him out of town. What to do then. I must have expressed my feelings, for Mr. Cardaza’s partner said, “Is there anything I can do for you?”
He spoke in such a sympathetic tone that I blurted out the need I was in. I wanted $30 and told him my trouble. He said, “Is that all. I don’t see why I can’t lend you that as well as Mr. Cardoza.”
“Oh will you? I will pay it the first money I get!”
“I have said nothing about pay, my young lady.”
So this good man loaned me the money. In a short time we went to Salem. George took us across the James River to Powhatan court house where Jeanie took what was called the Southside railroad. We had to change cars at Burkville for Lynchburg. We knew nothing of railroad travel, having always traveled on packet boat. When we got to Burkville a gentleman, a professor of Hampton Sidney College assisted us. He said he had a brother living in Salem, Judge Blair. I was always grateful to professor Blair.
When we got to Lynchburg my cousin, Mr. David Payne, introduced us to Colonel P. Taylor who was on the train. He was a courtly old gentleman and very kind. When we stopped at what is now Gedford City he introduced us to Mr. Samuel Griffin whose family lived in Salem. So we were fortunate again. We were soon in Salem, Colonel Taylor getting off at what is now Ronnoke* City. Then, simply, a railroad station with perhaps four houses, is now a city of fifty thousand. It has had a wonderful growth, and is called the “Magic City”.
This is a beautiful secion*, such a glorious agricultural country admidst* the smiling country. Around this station lay the lovely farms, the Taylors, Watts, and McClannahans. These splendid homes are swallowed up in the prosperous city. The N. and W. railroad has made the city with its workshops and hundreds of employees. Salem was considered first, but the Mayor and town council went hunting to avoid meeting the railroad men. They said they did not want the railroad. Now the citizens that succeed these dodards* suffer. But there wasno* city when we came, only a station.
(section*, amidst*, dotards*, was no*. A dotard is an old person, stuck in their ways)
When we arrived it was raining and we had a dismal reception. My cousin had arranged board for us with a widow and we rented the schoolroom and desks of our predecessor. We had thirty pupils, clever and obedient. My experience was very pleasant, and trustees considerate. We came, strangers in their midst, and had no reason to regret it. We taught English, Latin, French and music. I had no trouble in collecting bills or the management of the children. They seemed devoted to us and the patrons were satisfied.
We had little social life, we were so busy. I paid what I owed. When I paid the gentleman who loaned the money he expressed surprise at my promptness, and said I was welcome to have kept it as long as I wished. After a few months our landlady was disagreeable and I decided to find a more comfortable and congenial place, so we moved toanother* lady’s where we remained to the end of the session.
I was much interested in our mission. Only seven Episcopalians. We had service from the minister, Rev. Edward Ingle of St. Johns church, a country church supported by the wealthy land owners. Our services were held in the Masonic Hall over the Tin Shop. Mr. Ingle was anxious that we should have a chapel and the little handful commenced to work. He was most enterprising and solicited funds from the north. We bought a lot and soon the building was under way. The building was constructed with school rooms above which we were to rent at $100 a year. Among my pupils were a good many Presbyterians. It seems a spirit of jealousy possessed them and nothing was said to me. A few days before we left for Dungeness the lady with whom we boarded came to me and said she would be my friend and advised me not to return to Salem, as the Presbyterians had decided to engage Miss Fanny Johnston to establish a school and she said you will lose all your scholars.
“Why,” I said, “they have all told me they will return.”
“That does not matter, they won’t come, and I hate to have you and your sister disappointed and have you move your family.”
I was completely staggered by this. I went to my room and took up my Bible and opened at this passage, “Stay in the land and verily thou shall be fed.”
This decided me. I would stay. The next day I informed the trustees of the school. They were indignant and said they would do all they could for me if I would come back, and would look after my interest while I went home. Of course this silent undercurrent did not at all please me, but leaving everything in the hands of the trustees, I left for home. I had a picnic with the children, some of them had a pack of cards without my knowledge, but I made no protest, not feeling any. The next day a letter was brought to me, saying this gentleman would have to withdraw his children from his promise to attend my school the coming session as his conscience would not allow him to send his children to a school where card playing was allowed. I had already been told that he had promised his children to Mrs. Johnston before the cards were played. This I knew, so my contempt for his* was extreme.
I answered his note, telling him that cards was a subterfuge, that his children were as much bound to me as a gentleman’s word could make them. I left Salem quite indignant, but with many friends to battle for me. On my return, I had 60 pupils, though the year before only 30. My family decided to come, and we rented a house of only four rooms, for which I paid $25 a month, George rented our home. John taught again with Mr. Dabney and studied law with Mr. Tucker. My father, mother, Joe, Joe, Edith, Mercer, Nellie, Strother, Jeanie and myself moved to Salem.
I found my friends the trustees had worded nobly for me against bitter opposition. The Presbyterians had two objections to us. We were Episcopalians and Eastern Virginians, great crimes both, but instead of 30 we had 60 pupils. There were no public schools and as I had the family to provide for I had offered to take pupils for whatever the parents could supply, wood, provisions of all kinds, sewing, washing, doctor’s bills, anything. We Were a family of 8 with my father, mother and aunt Martha. We had only six rooms including basement, so we were so crowded that my aunt we feared would not be comfortable, so my cousin (her nephew) offered her a home. We were greatly distressed to see her go, but dared not oppose it, as we had no future. She came to see us every week and stayed several days, which my cousin did not like.
This summer we had crowds for weeks and passersby, once for three weeks a regiment, all that was left off Colonel Stevensons Kentucky regiment. Our very great friend Major John Reeve was in this command. We had the horses and servants to feed and were glad to do it. Our friends were completely nonplussed. They could not go home. An old cousin, Dr. James from Lancaster, Virginia stopped by to see us and stayed several months. He came to Petersburg in search of his son, who was wounded at the Battle of the Crater and he could hear nothing. He could not find him at Petersburg, so came to us. Poor man, he asked anxiously of every passing soldier they could tell him of his son. After many weeks he had the news that he had died of his wound. There was no communication and nobody had any money, so he stayed on until finally my father let him have the money, $40, with which he bought a horse and left for home. We were sorry to see him go. He was my father’s first cousin, a clever mn*, highly educated, and an old fashioned Virginia gentleman. We met him afterwards in Salem where we both lived and our families were very intimate.
We were especially fond of Cousin Robert, who was devoted to us anda* day never passed without a visit from him. He was ever kind and faithful until his sudden death.
In the fall of that year the boys, George and John went to Mr. Hilary Jones school, Hanover Acadany*. While there John was very ill, my motherhad* to spend several weeks there. There were no trained nurses then, but our dear aunt was with us. The servants were very good, much better than one could have supposed with the bad advise* given them. They remained and worked pretty well for a year.
(Academy*, mother had*, advice*)
In the meantime the provost marshalls, who were very common men, made themselves most detestible. We felt the injustice of this treatment and the indignities put on our President. General Grant acted the gentleman in his terms of surrender to General Lee and soldiers, but I see little humanity in loading President Davis in irons, even from the standpoint that he was a traitor.
Our future was like Egyptian darkness. Our father and mother were helpless, with 11 children, only two educated, and no income. The servants had to be fed. They could not go. The liberal Federal government failed to keep the promise of “forty acres of land and a mule”. So they were a great care to us. As we felt they were becoming a burden, we persuaded them to hire out.
Our house servants were so well trained and so well known, as our house was always full, they found no trouble in getting homes. We were soon with no help, and had to bring in our wood and do our cleaning. All the children helped. Everything was so hard on my parents. My father had no profession, having been a planter. There was no business, everything was disorganized. I shuddered then with apprehension and sympathy and shudder now at the recollection of its horrows*. No one gave the helping hand but our northern friends. One friend heard that our house was burned, and came to find us, doing all he could bringing food and clothes.
Another New York friend sent us a sewing machine, the first I ever saw. It cost $300. Our southern friends resented our acceptance of these gifts, but had they been offered to them their viewpoint might have changed.
I wish I could blot out those horrible days. We were all so miserable. My parents found it hard to adjust themselves to the new regime. Berefit* of every comfort, no money, no schools, friends scattered, labored, labor all gone, our beautiful lands lying idle, and we were on the verge of starvation. My father owed a money lender (a shylock) $10,000 which he had borrowed to buy a piece of land adjoining ours, which my father bought a few years before the Civil War began. He did not dream of was* and never doubted he could pay easily.
The clamor for debts increased. The owner of the mortgage became insolent and advertised our home. I went to Richmond. General Stoneman was in command. I represented the case. He was very gentlemanly and politely listened to my tale of woe, and granted “Injunction”. I went home rejoicing that we had a home for several months. In the meantime my father had $30,000 owing to him, which was useless to try to collect and of which he collected $300.
Here we stayed. My mother wrote to her nephew Colonel G.W. Hansbrough, a lawyer, who refugeed from West Virginia to Salem, Virginia during the war. He kindly came and advised us to sell the beautiful home Dungeness and pay debts and move to a small town where there was education and advantages. We had a tutor then for the boys, a Mr. Norris who instructed well, but could not afford anything. John was an unusually clever boy and said he was going to teach school, so I set to work to find him a position, and succeeded in finding him on* in Virginious Dabney’s Classical school in Middleburg London County, Virginia, which he filled most successfully, and at the same time studied law with Mr. John Randolph Tucker. John was in Middleburg for two years, graduated in law and decided to go to New York , But I am going too fast. George said he would rent the farm. My cousin thought I could get a school in Salem where he lived and invited me to visit him and apply for a school which would be vacant in the fall, a Mrs. Randolph giving it up to go on as a missionary to China. She asked me to succeed her and being also asked by the trustees of the school applied and got it, my sister Jeanie as my assistant. I returned home feeling very grateful to my cousin and his family for their kindness. He had three attractive children, Marion, Livingston, and Lila. The girls, aged 14 and 11 were to be my pupils. One very pleasurable event occurred. My father and George and John rode over to call on General R.E. Lee who was spending the summer with his brother Charles Carter Lee in Powhatan County.
They spent a pleasant day, and a few weeks thereafter General Lee and his son, General Custer Lee returned the call and took lunch. How delighted they were! My mother had the best she could in our poverty which was appreciated and enjoyed by these gentlemen. I sang for them and the tears flowed down the Great General’s cheeks evidenced appreciation most toughingly*. At the close of the songs, he said to me, “Thank you, my child,” as he laid his hand on my shoulder. I have often thanked God for that caress. I count it as one of my treasures. We sat in the beautiful hall and had such as delightful afternoon, of course so sad, all of us completely at sea as to our future, which we endeavored to forget in this never to be forgotten hour. As we sat with all ten of us and my parents eager to catch each word and smile, my little brother Strother played with the General’s gold spurs (a present). Strother was so pleased that finally was emboldened to say “If you don’t mind I wish you would give them to me”. The general leaned forward and patted the little three year old fellow on the head.
“Oh, my son, they have to be won.”
It was nearing evening when they bade us goodbye. My father and the boys escorted them across the river and a part of their ride to Mr. Charles Carter Lee’s. General Lee refused lucrative positions and accepted the presidency of Washington and Lee University at Lexington, Virginia. This institution was called Washington College, and afterwards the double honor of Lee was added.
My grandfather, Reverend Joseph D. Logan taught in the university when it was first a simple school. My grandfather was said to be the cleverest of seven brothers who were in the Presbyterian ministry, sons of Mr. James Logan and Hannah, niece of John Know. I once had the papers of Logan family, natives of Scotland, but they with the Spotswood, Dandridge, Strother and Clayton genealogies were burned in the Atlanta, Georgia fire, May 29th, 1917, a loss I much deplore. Again, I digress. I wonder if all old people do so as much as I do. I return to 1868.
But I have again digressed. George was still in the 4th Virginia cavalry, and John was crazy to go. A friend of Jeanie’s came on a visit and offered to take John as his aid. He was colonel of a regiment, so finally our parents consented. John was a fine horseman and a good shot, so he was allowed to go. Colonel Bolton let him take a servant, George Nicholas, one of our dining room boys. There was great excitement in the family, white and black, when they left.
We lived along, anxious and hungrey*, getting news of the death of our friends at every battle and of great suffering among our soldiers. General Lee sent a request for food and everyone nobly responded. This left the whole section with a limited supply. We had nothing but meat and bread to give, so we lived on until spring. Then the fighting was concentrated around Richmond and Petersburg. We, my mother, Jeanie and I decided to go to Richmond, hearing that the cavalry would be ordered to the south side. We hoped to see our boys. We boarded with a Mrs. Wolfe on Franklin street. In a few days the cavalry passed through the city. It was a sad and solmen* procession of ragged, downcast, starving men who passed us by, horses lank and lean, scarcely able to march. Our hearts bled and tears overflowed as our dear “boys” went by. This was on Friday. We stayed a few days seeing friends. On Sunday my mother went to St. Pauls church, and I went to St James. Willie Worthing went with me. When we came out we noticed great excitement and horror depicted on every face and citizens rushing to and fro with pictures and valuables in their arms.
We hurried to our boarding house, and my mother had much to tell us. Jean was with us having also returned from church. The desolating news was that the enemy had captured Petersburg. This was a dark hour. Everyone left Richmond that could get away, the President and the Cabinet also. Of course there was no hope left for Richmond. There we were, forty miles from Dungeness, and no way to communicate. The canal, our only mode of transportation destroyed by Yankees, no telegraph. We were in despair. We packed our clothes with the assistance our maid Eliza gave us. She had gone to Richmond with us. We have our inherited silver with us so we fastened it under our hoop skirts. I was determined not to be captured by the Yankees and told my friends that I would walk home.
My soldier friends tried to get a conveyance, but it seemed impossible. All horses and mules were taken by the confederate government, taken while the owners were riding them. Once a friend of mine, Mrs. Julian Harrison was being borne to the grave and the hearse was stopped on the way to the cemetary and the horses taken. All was fearful.
Our landlady left us and all the boarders. We were left alone. She left us the little food she had and bade us goodbye with tears. Our friends came in to say goodbye and there we sat all night. About 3 o’clock, two friends, soldiers on furlough, knocked. We all three went to the door. It was Captain Edward Owen of Washington Artillery and Lt. Caskie Cabell. They came to say that they have taken two little dump coal carts from two boys at the point of their pistols. One had a lame horse and the other a blind mule. They asked if we would go.
My mother said if she could get two miles to a friend, Colonel Carrington, that she knew he would send us home. We doubted if the maimed and emaciated animals could get us there, but we started. I insisted on carrying our two trunks, so we unfastened the pieces of silver which we had worn all day, packed it in our trunks and started, Eliza decided she would stay in the city.
We got in the dirty carts, perched on our trunks. The gentlemen walked, urging the animals along. By this time the Yankees had entered the lower end of the city, set fires, and were bombarding. As we drove slowly and in silence, we heard glass in windows shatter around and could hear the tramp of the cavalry and the glaring flames. We hoped and prayed. The day began to break, and when we reached Colonel Carringtons they gave us a hearty welcome, as good a breakfast as they had and they gave us a road wagon, four horses, a driver, and a lunch basket of meat and bread. They started us on our journey to Dungeness, fory* miles, and as we drove along our driver showed great unwillingness to go, so our soldiers again drew their pistols.
As we went along we passed the patients from the hospitals and many others. The sick were so pale and hungry, that we decided to go hungry and gave our lunch to them. It was insufficient, of course.
We had great joy as we neared home. We stopped and fed the horses, we had brought food for them, and some kin* persons gave our party something to eat. We arrived at home about dark. Oh, the perfect delight of all, white and black to see us. My father was going the next day in search of us, having heard from those who arrived before that Richmond had been captured. My Aunt Martha told us she had been cooking (I mean the servants had) for the travelers. When we got there, the yard and house were full. The poor tired things were glad to sleep anywhere. They had no where to go, many remained for weeks. They came every day. We were kept busy.
We could here* the fighting going on, but no news and we were so anxious about the boys and our army. On April 9th General Robert E. Lee surrendered to General Grant. This sad news was brought to us by a straggler. We knew it was inevitable. Our soldiers, people and prisoners were starving and exhausted, dropping by the wayside as they marched. Where were our boys? We watched and prayed for them with anxious eyes. The house was full of soldiers wondering where they would go. At last, as we sat on the porch one afternoon, we saw two horsemen coming toward the house. They looked dejected and weary. As they came nearer, we recognized my brother John and his body servant George Nicholas. We hurried to meet John, and he literally fell in our arms, completely unnerved. George, the servant, said, “You see Mistus, I brought Marse John back like I promised you. I got him home by the hardest, Mistus, but I kept my word.”
Colonel Boston was shot in the last battle the day before. John was riding by his side in battle when he was shot and instantly killed, falling on John’s horse. It was a terrible shock. Fortunately George, my brother, was in the same battle and helped to bury him. He was buried in his uniform without a coffin. They marked his grave.
The next 9th of April the surrender was made at Appomattox Court House. John was detailed to convey the sad news of Col. Boston’s death to his family. His sister worte*, “I opened the door and there sat this soldier boy with his hear* on his arms, weeping. I asked him, “My dear boy, what is the matter?” “I have to tell you Colonel Boston is killed’. He was sore distressed. I almost forgot my grief in his.”
After delivering his message John thought he ought to go back to the army. George, his servant, spoke, “No sir, Marse John. You ain’t got nobody to report to. General Lee done surrendered. We’re going home to Mistus.”
So they came. We were all so glad George had so much sense. Then we all asked for my brother George. They said George did not surrender but left the day before after Colonel Boston was buried, for Lynchburg, hoping to join General Johnston. But when they arrived they saw the futility of it and retraced their steps. Dr. Fleming, Dr. Miclie and George came together. There was great rejoicing, though our hearts were very sad.